Birthday Party
by shizuke
Summary: Sasuke and Itachi have to get dates in time for Sasuke's birthday party. Let the seduction of Uzumaki Naruto and Hyuuga Neji begin. SasuNaru ItaNeji, slight AU
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto and am not making any money whatsoever out of this. ok?

WARNING: Itachi OOCness, AU-ish, slight slight slight Uchihacest.

Pairings: SasukeNaruto, ItachiNeji, uchihacest (completely brotherly love, nothing more)

A/N: Well, I know that Itachi's a bad guy and all but I really want to write a story where he and Sasuke were really like very close brothers. O, and some people consider ItachiNeji as a crack pairing but I think they're okay. Most Itachi pairing are with Sakura, Naruto or Sasuke. They're a lot of OCs and Mary-Sues too where Itachi is considered so I wanna write ItachiNeji. There!

Facts of the story: Itachi did not kille the Uchiha clan but he and Sasuke are the only reaming Uchiha's nonetheless. Will explain in further chapters.

* * *

**In which there will be a birthday party for Sasuke whether he likes it or not...**

Seventeen was the official coming of age in Konoha, whether boy or girl. It signified when a family business could be passed down to a son or when a daughter could be open to marriage proposals. However, to Uchiha Sasuke, apparently, it meant nothing.

He was going to turn seventeen two weeks from now. His friends and acquaintances were planning on throwing a huge party, something like a village festival (yes, they adored the Uchiha _that_ much) in celebration of his birthday.

How did Sasuke react to this?

"…" SLAM! He slammed the door in the messenger's face. The messenger reported this to Haruno Sakura and Yamanako Ino, suspecting that maybe Sasuke-san wasn't really keen on having a party. Sakura and Ino, chief planners of the party, waved that off as nonsense and said that Sasuke was just shy. He would love them for doing this for him! Ri-ight.

After receiving the unpleasant news, Sasuke sat down at the breakfast table, looked at his onigiri with calm disinterest, and smashed it with his hand the next moment.

On the other side of the table, Uchiha Itachi's eyebrow twitched. Dare he ask? Dare he? "Sasuke, something wrong?" Wrong question, though, cause there was always something wrong with Sasuke. He was never really a happy boy to begin with.

"A few idiots in the village wants to throw a birthday party for me," replied Sasuke in a monotone, proceeding to clean the rice off his hand. "I'm just irritated that they're doing this without my consent."

_I-I can see that._ "So, are you going to tell them off?" asked Itachi, sipping his coffee.

"I don't even see how I could get the message through their thick heads. I tried last time at my ninja academy orientation. It didn't work, did it?"

Itachi downed the rest of his coffee. _No, it sure didn't. _For some reason, whenever his little brother told off his fangirls, he got more fangirls in return. It was an unexplainable phenomenon. Itachi was sort of glad when he found out that his mangenkyo sharingan could be used to decrease his own number of fangirls.

"So," began Itachi, "what are you going to do about this party. It would be rude, even by your standards, not to go since you're the main event. It _is_ your coming of age, after all."

"Whatever," muttered Sasuke with a scowl.

"No. No 'whatever'. You have to get a date," said Itachi.

Date…date…date…date…

The horrendous word echoed like a death sentence in Sasuke's ears. "No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"NO!"

"You're an Uchiha, Sasuke!" said Itachi, standing up and bringing himself to full height. "And as such you must uphold the Uchiha name! Therefore you must bring a date to this party."

Sasuke scowled darkly and looked away from his brother. Although Itachi had not bothered to explain what the Uchiha name had anything to do with Sasuke bringing a date to his birthday party, Sasuke could never go against him when he used the 'uphold the Uchiha name' tactic.

"And I will find a date for myself too," added Itachi as a quick afterthought. "I mean, why let you have all the fun?"

The younger Uchiha wanted to ask his brother what he meant by 'fun' but failed to do so because Itachi promptly put on his jounin jacket and made for the door. "Therefore I will spend the entire of today to search a date for myself."

"What? Why do you need a whole day?" asked Sasuke. "I have the hotline to the Die for Uchiha Itachi fan club."

Itachi barely stifled a shiver that ran up his spine. "Would _you_ ask one of _your_ fangirls to be your date?" Sasuke shook his head without even considering it. "See? I'm off."

"Wait." Sasuke grabbed Itachi by the neck and leaned up to peck his brother on the cheek. With a small smirk, he said, "Have a nice day, Itachi." In reply, Itachi ruffled Sasuke's hair and left.

* * *

**In which Itachi finds his date…**

Itachi chewed leisurely on his dango (a Japanses snack. It's the snack Mitarashi Anko was eating during the Second Phase of the Chuunin Selection Exam) as he watched the people of Konoha go on with their daily routines. Occasionally, one or two of his friends would stop for a chat or warn him of oncoming fangirls. When he spotted fangirls within the vicinity, he would _henge_ (transform) into somebody else and return to his normal form when the fangirls were gone.

"Itachi?"

The Uchiha glanced down at the blonde figure who called him. "Hi Naruto," he greeted, waving his dango stick.

"What are you doing on the roof of Ichiraku Ramen?" asked Naruto innocently.

"I'm looking for a potential person to be my date for Sasuke's birthday party," answered Itachi honestly, if not bluntly.

"Oh," said Naruto. "Anyone yet?" Itachi shook his head. Naruto grinned. "Why don't you just date that _teme_ (bastard)?" asked Naruto cheekily, obviously referring to Sasuke. "He's definitely pretty enough."

At this, Itachi raised both eyebrows in amusement. "Nah, my fangirls and his fangirls would start a war. Hey, you wanna get some ramen?" …since they were at a ramen store and all…

Surprising, Naruto declined the offer. "I just ate," he said, pointing to the mountain of ramen bowls sitting on the counter in Ichiraku. "Neji treated me," he added with a wide smile. "By the way, what's taking him so long?" He cupped his hands around his mouth and yelled, "Oi, Neji! Does it take that long to use the toilet?"

Itachi jumped off the roof and landed in front of the Ichiraku entrance, having finished his dango and planning to go somewhere else to seek out a potential date.

At that moment, Neji strode out of Ichiraku, (looking a little miffed) keeping the change from the bill into his wallet. "Calm down, there was a long queue in front of the toilet," he explained, slightly irritated. "I can't believe you made me treat you. I think you ate up a whole B-rank mission allowance – ah!"

Right at that moment, Neji's hand slipped when trying to push the last coin from the change into his wallet. (Imagine all this in slow motion) The coin fell. Neji bent over to get it. His foot stepped on a spill from a soup of ramen that conveniently happened to be there and he slipped. Yes, Hyuuga Neji slipped.

Neji squeezed his eyes shut. Oh, this was going to be embarrassing. Hyuuga Neji falling flat on his face due to slipping on a soup spill. He was never going to live it down. His family was never going to let him forget it. Waiting for the hard ground to meet him, Neji was quite surprised when he felt firm warmth under him instead.

He had fallen, that was for sure. But what was this that broke his fall. Raising his upper body a bit, he opened his white pearl eyes and was greeted by the sight of Konoha's no.1 ninja groaning under him.

As it turned out, Neji had fallen over Itachi, bringing the Uchiha down with him, or rather under him.

Itachi rubbed the back of his head. He could have evaded that easily but for some reason his body didn't respond. Perhaps he had wanted to save the boy?

Itachi knew the Hyuugas. He knew many good fighters that were from the Hyuugas. But he did not pay much attention to them. So he was not familiar with Hyuuga Neji. All he knew was that this Neji fellow was an acquaintance of Sasuke's. Nothing more.

Yet as he opened his Sharingan stained eyes to glance up at the creature staring back down at him, he wondered briefly if that light fall had been enough to send him to heaven. Because this was surely an angel.

Neji flinched. The Uchiha was moving. Why? He was staring at Neji dazedly. Why? Did that fall cause him some brain damage or something? Shit. The whole village would hold him responsible for hurting Konoha's no.1 ninja. Not to mention, there was the Die for Uchiha Itachi fan club to be worried about. All these thoughts passed through Neji's worried mind in merely one second.

They all diminished when Itachi stirred slightly under him. Neji could barely refrain himself from sighing out in relief. So he's okay. The Uchiha will live. Well all the worrying was pointless then. Neji was about to get off Itachi when he was suddenly pinned by the seductive smile Itachi was sending him.

Neji got chills. Uchiha Itachi…was smiling at him…seductively? There was something _very_ wrong with this picture.

"Hi there, gorgeous," said Itachi.

Alarms rang wildly in Neji's head. 'Danger! Danger! Run immediately! Escape immediately!' _Run? Absolutely not! _

Itachi brought one of Neji's hands to his lips. "Would you be my date for my cute little brother's birthday party?"

Neji's cheeks flushed red as his eyebrow twitched. 'Care to rephrase?' He swallowed. He should have run. "No."

"Say what?" asked Itachi."

"Sorry, but I refuse," said Neji with all the calm that he could muster. He quickly got off Itachi like a prey jumping away from a predator.

Itachi got up and brushed dust away from his clothes. He looked at Neji intently and sent him that seductive look again. "I'm sorry too. I don't accept no as an answer…Neji." The poor Hyuuga felt chills running up his spine again.

After what seemed like an eternity to Neji, Itachi finally looked away and acknowledged Naruto with a small smile. "I think I'll be returning home now, Naruto. I've already found my date."

"I told you I refuse!" said Neji loudly and angrily but the Uchiha had already disappeared in a puff of smoke.

Neji slowly turned to Naruto and gave him a look that said, 'This was all your fault.'

Naruto laughed nervously and guiltily. "Well, you already said no, right?"

"You know him better than me," said Neji. "Do you think he's the type that will haunt me until I agree to go?"

Hesitantly Naruto nodded honestly. A black cloud hanging over his head, Neji headed for home without saying goodbye. Naruto sighed. "Poor guy. At least I don't have a creepy Uchiha trying to get me to be his date," he added cheerfully.

How wrong. How terribly wrong Naruto was.

* * *

Sasuke had just returned from his private training when he noticed Itachi reading the newspaper in the dining room. "Oi, back so soon? Don't tell me you've given up," he said with a smirk.

"Of course not," replied Itachi. "I've already found my date. I just have to get him to agree to be my date. That's all. A small problem." He turned a page of the newspaper.

Sasuke shook his head with disbelief. "So it's a guy? I pity him for being your target. Who is it?"

"Neji from the Hyuuga," said Itachi, a mischievous smile tugging at his lips. He contained the urge to lick his lips at the remembrance of lying under the Hyuuga boy. Ah, what a beautiful first meeting.

"Neji?" asked Sasuke, doubt creeping into his voice. "Don't hurt yourself trying to get him. He's almost as good as a jounin."

"And I'm better than all the jounins," retorted Itachi indifferently. "Besides that, I found someone who could be your potential date too."

"Oh?" Sasuke sounded a little interested despite himself. Someone Itachi picked must be someone he did not think off. "Who?"

Itachi put down his newspapers, a cheeky smile directed at Sasuke. "Did you know Naruto thinks you're pretty?"

* * *

A/N: I know the rating is 'M' but nothing's happened. Don't worry. Something will happen _soon_. Well, actually that depends on whether the reviews say that people still wanna read this or not. If not, than I'll just take it off and start a new project. But I would really like reviews - not flames - reviews.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto etc. etc. etc.

A/N: I posted a different chapter 2 before this but didn't really like it so i changed it to this! there are some changes to the original. thanks to all who read and/or reviewed. i hope you will continue to follow this fic.

* * *

Sasuke's face showed a mask of indifference, as if somebody just told him snow melted into water. "So Naruto thinks I'm pretty? Everybody thinks I'm pretty," he said offhandedly. And it was true. Itachi thought he was pretty too. Sasuke was blessed with a slender face structure that was more popular than muscles at this day and age. And he hated it.

But like it or not, he was the Adonis of Konoha and the day when someone rejects to be his date would be the day when they exiled ninjas turn good. Still, Naruto? Of all the people Itachi thought Sasuke should ask, he suggested Naruto?

There was not one thing about the dobe that was attractive, in Sasuke's opinion. He was loud, noisy, clumsy, slow, dumb and Sasuke was 75 sure he was colour blind (what with the fluorescent orange suit he seemed to like so much). Why in the world would he choose him over all the better-looking people in Konoha?

"So you're not going to consider Naruto-kun?" asked Itachi.

"No."

* * *

**In which Uchiha Itachi visits the Hyuuga Branch House...**

Because he had been previously occupied with missions, it has been ages since he saw either of his old team mates. Neji would never admit it even if you tickled him to death but he missed having them around. Just for that he had made an appointment with Lee and TenTen just to have a drink or some lunch together or maybe even some training.

Neji stretched his arms and stepped out of his futon sleepily as he worked over his schedule for the day in his head. Mornings were a routine for him. Brush teeth, wash face, short shower, put on clothes, comb hair, morning stretches… so far he proceeded through all of this with no commotion until –

"Uchiha-sama, what brings you to our humble abode so early in the morning?"

The comb he held in his hand dropped to the floor with a resounding klunk. That was the voice of the greeter of the Hyuuga Branch House. And this Uchiha-sama…could it be Sasuke coming in search of a fight with him? But Sasuke wouldn't just barge in and demand a fight. He'd usually make sure that that time and day would be okay with Neji. Which could only mean…

"I'm looking for Hyuuga Neji," said a voice that was foreign in the Hyuuga Branch house. "Is he here?"

"Neji?" replied the greeter. "Ah yes, he is still in bed I think. I shall go and wake him immediately."

SHIT! Neji cursed inwardly. He didn't know Itachi would act this fast! Got to get away! Got to get away! The window! He slid open the window that led into one of the many small courtyards of the Hyuuga residence. If he was careful, he might just get away.

""No, no," he heard Itachi say. "I'm satisfied to just wait in his room."

Crap! He climbed over the window. At the same moment, he heard a pair of footsteps leading to his room.

"This is Neji's room," said the Hyuuga greeter. He slid open the door to an empty room where the futon was not yet made and there was a solitary comb lying on the tatami. "That's odd. Where could Neji be? It is unlikely that he leave his futon unmade."

The visitor stepped into Neji's room, his eyes running over every object and detail. "Well, this is indeed unfortunate. I was hoping to ask him to train with me today."

"Train? With you?" There were traces of disbelief in the greeter's voice.

"Is that a problem?" asked Itachi, hints of a threat in his voice.

"None at all," said the Hyuuga almost apologetically.

Itachi stepped into the room and the first thing he took note of was the open window. People do not usually sleep with the window this wide open unless the weather was unusually warm and last night had been chilly. There were several possibilities.

One, Neji forgot to close the window and therefore slept in the chill. If that was the case, he should be waking up with a cold this morning. Two, Neji woke up and opened the window to let the sunlight in but had left it open when he left the Hyuuga residence. Three, Neji sensed his arrival and had jumped out the open window for a quick escape.

From Sasuke's previous description of this Hyuuga Neji, Itachi surmised that Neji was not one who was as careless as to leave the window open in a chilly night. Therefore the first possibility was ruled out. Furthermore, the Hyuuga greeter said that he had not seen Neji come out yet which left only the third possibility.

Neji had escaped. Itachi placed his hands on the windowsill and looked out the window intently. Other than a servant walking past with the laundry, the small courtyard was empty. It had rained last night and the ground was still soft so if Neji had gotten up and ran from the window, he would've left behind his footprints. But there were none. Which meant…

Itachi looked directly downwards and smiled. "What are you doing squatting underneath the window, Neji-san?"

The younger boy tried to stifle his wince at being found out and stood up. "Morning exercises," he said, keeping nervousness out of his voice.

"In your sleeping yukata?" asked Itachi teasingly. "You haven't even bothered to put on some slippers. Look, your feet are all dirty."

Neji ignored the crumble of the soft ground between his toes as he took several steps to distance himself from Itachi. "I forgot to put them on."

"Well clean yourself and put on some shoes. I want to take you somewhere," said Itachi.

"I'm sorry but I will have to decline your offer," said Neji stiffly. "I already have an appointment with someone else later and am not fit to break it."

"Oh?" Itachi tried not to let the disappointment show on his face. "Would you mind if I tagged along?"

"Very much."

"Neji, how dare you speak that way to Uchiha-sama!" exclaimed the Hyuuga greeter. "He has gone out of his way to invite you and you will not treat him with your insolence."

Itachi held up a commanding hand. The Hyuuga greeter paused. "It's alright," said Itachi. "I guess I shouldn't have just sprung this on you. I'll make an appointment next time. Perhaps tomorrow would be a better date?"

No. Neji wanted to say no. With Itachi, there was no such thing as a better date. But Itachi had gone and made his decision for him. "Good then. It's settled. Nine tomorrow morning in front of Ichiraku's. Itsureshimasu." He bowed his head slightly and left.

The Hyuuga greeter went with him. Several seconds later, after Neji was sure that they were gone, he let out a relieved sigh. He was lucky to have managed to weasel out of that one. He wasn't very good at lying so if he hadn't really had an appointment today, he would've been done for. But tomorrow was another thing. How was he going to get out of that one?

…Naruto.

* * *

**Old friends come to Konoha...**

The gates of Konoha were always open to travelling merchants, visitors and ninjas from neighbouring country. And it was on that day that two parties of shinobi, foreign shinobi, were heading towards Konohas.

The first party was a party of three; two males and one female. The female had pale yellow hair tied with two hair bands and carried a large fan that was almost as tall as her person. The first male covered all of his body in black except his face which he decorated with purple lines and he carried a bandage package on his back. The second male had short red hair, a solemn expression and a large gourd strapped to his back.

These were the Sunagakure shinobis of the Wind Country. But they weren't just any shinobis. They were the Kazekage and his two siblings.

The second party comprised of only two people; both male. The first was tale with pale grey skin. The lower part of his face was in bandages and he carried a large knife made for beheading. His companion was shorter than he was, with a slender frame hidden under layers of cloth and a face that should've belonged to a girl.

These were the Kirigakure shinobis of the Water Country. They weren't ordinary either. The exiled ninja, Momochi Zabuza and the unknown genius, Haku, was making their way towards Konoha.

The two parties encountered one another in front of Konoha's open gates and took some time appraising one another. Both parties knew that the other party were strong shinobis, not to be messed with if they could help it.

"Ho, the young Kazekage. What an honour," said Zabuza, by way of greeting.

Kazekage Gaara didn't answer. He merely glared at Zabuza, like he did with everyone else. His gaze drew from Zabuza to Haku. Gaara nodded at him. Haku nodded in return. An acknowledgement. Temari and Kankurou looked at each other. Did Gaara know this boy from Kirigakure?

"Are you here for the Uchiha's party as well?" asked Gaara in his usual dark monotone.

Haku shook his head. "No, we've come to Konoha for a different reason."

And without any farewells, the two parties entered Konoha and parted ways to their desired destinations.

* * *

**In which someone disturbs the Uchihas...**

There was someone at the entrance of their house. Itachi told Sasuke to go see who was bothering them, but Sasuke refused to get up from the tatami. So Itachi threw an empty isotonic drink can at him. Upon having the can hit his head, Sasuke tackled Itachi on where he sat. This resulted in a short sparring session with no one to welcome the visitor.

By then, the person outside was saying in a loud voice that if nobody was going to meet him, he was going to break through the sliding screen (they don't use doors, they use sliding screens…or something). Distracted by the loud voice, Itachi successfully threw Sasuke onto the tatami, confirming his win of the short sparring match.

"You go get it," said Itachi with a smirk.

Sasuke grumbled most childishly and went to slide open the screen for the idiots who were bothering them. Said idiots were Sakura and Naruto; Sasuke almost felt bad for cursing them before he opened the sliding screen. Almost.

"What do you want?" he asked in the most casual-cum-annoyed tone he could manage.

"I came to finalize a few things on the party with you," said Sakura with a smile.

Sasuke sighed, annoyed. "I never agreed to the party in the first place so what makes you think I would sit down and finalize these plans with you?"

"You still owe me from the last mission," stated Sakura as a matter-of-factly, keeping that innocent expression on her face. "If it weren't for me, you would've ended up with a buttful of porcupine spikes."

Naruto guffawed. "I still can't believe you almost sat on a porcupine."

And Itachi with his super-hearing, stored this little piece of information in his head for future blackmailing. Sasuke scowled and whacked Naruto on the head. "And? What business do you have with me, dobe?"

"You're so full of yourself," said Naruto, sticking out his tongue. "I'm here to see Itachi." He proceeded to let himself in, walking past Sasuke to sit himself opposite Itachi on the tatami mats. Sasuke frowned and turned back to Sakura.

"Well, come on," he said, walking in and expecting her to follow him, which she did.

Sasuke and Naruto sat on opposite sides of the room so Sasuke couldn't hear what Naruto was speaking about to Itachi, which really roused his curiosity because Naruto barely knew Itachi. Why would he want to speak with him all of a sudden? As a result, he barely paid any attention to Sakura and nodded his head every time Sakura asked for his opinion. He would later regret it.

After some time, Naruto lowered his head in resignation. Looks like whatever Naruto was trying to convey to Itachi didn't get through, thought Sasuke. "Fine," he heard Naruto say. "At least I tried." Naruto stood up, bowed to Itachi and made to leave.

But Itachi stopped him. He still had one more question. "Naruto, who are you going with to Sasuke's party?"

Naruto cocked his head a little to the side, showing his confusion. "Going with?"

"Who is your date?" explained Itachi.

Sasuke scoffed inwardly. No one would ask the dobe out. Why would Itachi direct such a question to Naruto? Was he trying to embarrass him?

Naruto grinned. "I'm going with Gaara."

* * *

_Tsuzuku (2 b cont.)_


End file.
